The anticipation of what will happen
When you get dressed
Is more than I can bear
This phase is going on forever 
And it’s one I can never share
With anyone 
As it’s first thing in the morning
Getting dressed for school
And it might not be a phase anyway
It might not be a phase at all.
Every morning you throw your pants about
You scream and shout
Complain about your leggings
You won’t put on your socks
They’re falling down
They’re itchy
They’re scratchy
I hate leggings
You’re not helping me
Stop helping me
We try getting dressed at the same time
But you yell You’ve got your pants on before me
And you collapse in a heap crying
I’ve tried getting dressed slowly
So slowly 
But you still don’t get dressed.
We’ve tried getting dressed in your room
In my room
With music on 
With music off
Downstairs, upstairs, in the bathroom
With me leaving you to it
With me saying I’ll meet you downstairs
Hurry up warmer weather, help me out
You lived in your £2 dress and pants last summer
So quick to put on without even a shout
But what if it’s too small now…
…this phase may not be a phase at all.

Did you know my laugh echoes in the darkness 
You say on a wet and windy evening
As we find ourselves in the desolate park
Your face beaming as you get on the swing
Oblivious to the depressing playground with not much in
And the cold, dark December feeling
The bit between Christmas day and New Year.
Wonky Donkey you shout
As I lift the swing higher and higher
And move it about to make it wobble
Your pink neon unicorn hat making its way through the air
You wee in a hedge
And we start walking home
With your laugh echoing in the darkness
The day before new years eve.
We spontaneously go to a pub 
For half a pint of lager and a packet of crisps
And an apple juice 
You make the man laugh behind the bar
Flicking up the ears on your unicorn hat 
And he says you’ve made his day
And I’m glad we ventured out 
To buy bin liners
And visit the park
Needing a break from the inside
On this dark, December evening
And we walk home, our laughs echoing in the darkness.

Do the numbers, do the numbers you say
After you spin, twirl and wiggle along the corridor
While I fill up your bath
Craig Revel Hall you shout
4 I reply
Oh no! you gasp
Shirley Something you say
A ten from Shirley, never too early I reply
Yes! You shriek, a smile as wide as your ears
Mokski you say
9 
Yessssssss
Anton Du Wotsit you announce
7 I say
Nooo mum say 8 
8 I say
Whoopie! Good old Anton you shout
And you run along the corridor into my arms 
Grinning from ear to ear
Do it again, do it again you demand
But this time I want 40!
And so it goes on 
Until the bath is full
And then it’s my turn
And Craig gives me a 1
And you fall about laughing
And you can’t believe Craig would do that
Even though you’re being Craig
And so it goes on
And on
And on
And on

And on.